Yesterday I crossed the 6 week mark of having no sugar in my diet. Not only am I surprised, I am overwhelmingly grateful that I have met this milestone in my journey.
Yesterday was also a small family gathering at my nephew’s house. His parents (his dad is my husband’s brother) came up from Florida for a couple of days to see them and invited us to spend the afternoon with them yesterday. They all know I am gluten-free so they had made special efforts to make sure I had gluten-free food to choose from. They do not know about the “sugar thing” as it is sometimes referred to by friends and family. I had taken a large green salad that I knew I could eat plenty of ‘just in case’. I also made a Cake in a Mug for myself so I would have something for desert when everyone else had theirs. I’ve learned it makes people very uncomfortable to eat in front of someone who is abstaining for whatever reason.
So, what surprised me? How did I surprise myself? Well… They have a small cake with raspberry filling, a fruit tart covered in fresh berries, and home-made chocolate chip-oatmeal-peanut butter cookies out for dessert. What surprised me was my immediate reaction to all of it. I walked by the counter with all the offerings and listened to all the “oohs and Umms”, but none of it looked the least bit enticing to me. Normally I would look at the stuff and start with the “woe is me” and “Oh, I wish” kind of thinking. That kind of thinking really does make one feel like a martyr and sort of like the world is being unfair.
None of those thoughts and none of those feelings were part of my experience. Instead of food being the center of my joy and happiness, I found that I was concentrating more on the people around me. I actually enjoyed watching them enjoy their feast. I got my Cake that I actually took the time to put icing on, and I sat and enjoyed it immensely.
It’s a baby step, but in some ways it felt like a huge Giant step towards sanity.
You know I stay away from the scale for the most part, but I also think it’s wise to step on once in a while just to see if everything is tracking. I mean how disappointing would it be for me to think I’m doing this right only to find out I gained! If I gain, I need to know so I can re-think and adjust what I’m doing.
Drum roll please: I’m down 17.2 pounds this morning.
My struggle at the moment is hanging on to the positive of losing 17.2 pounds. It’s easy for me to start thinking negatively about how no one can see the weight loss; no one has noticed that I’ve lost the weight. I can’t tell really in my clothes. I mean there are a few things I have from last summer that I am wearing that I didn’t wear last summer. But for the most part, my clothes are all new as of 1 – 2 weeks ago. I gave away almost my entire wardrobe and only have the things I look and feel good in. (well, except for those things I “need” for playing with the kids or relaxing beside a pool or walking around Carowinds.)
So…. I begin today, a Monday, the first day of this week, with a sigh of pleasure.